Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

Why do people hate on Serena (anime character)? What did she ever do to anyone except be a good friend to Ash Ketchum and an awesome trainer herself?

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I gave him everything. He said he loved me. Why?

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t cotton to rapists

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

Why am I so tired of seeing homeless people all over the place?

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I can count

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

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Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

Why does Filipino culture dictate that parents should be treated as gods?

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I have complete contempt for traitorism

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I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I know who the president of Turkey really is

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EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

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I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I understand how hurricane paths work

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

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I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t buy bullshit

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

Do married men know when their wives are having affairs?

I can read

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I actually pay taxes

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I have a reading level above third grade

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I have complete contempt for fakery

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I see through liars

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms